And the winner is….

ME! I win! I win the ‘Most Hateful Mom of the World’ award. How did I win? What did I win? How did you not know that there was even such a contest?! To start, how did I win? I won because I’m the meanest, most horrible mom. What did I win? I won a trip! A Mommy Guilt trip! Just for me. Disclaimer: Sorry this contest was not broadcast state or nationwide.

Well, let me tell you a little bit more of the story….

You see, it all started a long time ago, when my Honey bunny first started “fibbing” to me about brushing & flossing her teeth. This went on for awhile with rewards and/or punishment distributed periodically until the dentist finally had to mandate that she come to the office for check-ups & cleanings every 4 months because her teeth and gums were so badly deteriorating. I’m just gonna say, that my daily nagging was clearly not making a difference cuz she still wasn’t doing it.

Ok! Fast forward to a few days ago when I asked her if she was ready for school, including the usual, EVERY DAY things necessary to be ready for school, e.g., flossing, teeth brushing, face washing, to which she replied “Yes MOM, I’m ready”, and due to the fact that she’s perhaps been less truthful in the past, I asked again (thinking that maybe I’d give her ‘the out’ to come up & complete the tasks if she really hadn’t done them – damn am I an enabler?) but she says to me “WHY DON’T YOU BELIEVE ME?!” *read with whiny voice*

Right. Well, I decide I’d check out the situation in her bathroom sink before jumping to any conclusions. Uh oh. BONE DRY. I MEAN REALLY BONE DRY. Damn it! Now I’m gonna have to do something I really, very much do NOT want to do. What?! You’re probably screaming, what did you do?! I called her to come up to her bathroom and pointed to the Sahara desert that was her sink and asked how she could possibly have washed her face, flossed, and brushed her teeth in that sink. Her response was that it had dried. Suuuuure. At this juncture, I presented exhibit B, her little sister’s bathroom sink which was still wet from when she finished all the morning routine nearly an hour prior.

Shit slowly began to spiral outta control when I tell her that I was gonna have to do something now due to her total lie, that she brought it on herself, and that because she knows what she did was wrong, so on and so forth. I told her that she wouldn’t be able to go to the Halloween dance at school on Friday. Now comes the swirling vortex of crying, begging, pleading, bargaining, and more crying. Oh, just wait, it gets better.

15 minutes it has taken us to have this “conversation”, so now I’m not ready for work and she’s got to get to school before she’s late. I tell her to give me the permission slip & money for the dance. Commence additional wailing, pleading, bargaining (she told me I could take away her CELLPHONE, computer, and TV privileges, if I’d just let her go to the dance – heeyyy, I must have really struck a nerve with this punishment), crying, and the coup de grâce, “YOU HATE ME!!” Ahhhhh, life with an almost teenager. So much fun. Said NO ONE EVER. And now me too. I felt ill and so very sad because I wanted her to go to the dance! And have fun with her friends! But I just couldn’t let it go this time. I had to put my foot down. But damn it if I didn’t feel as horrible about the whole thing as she did. Was I doing the right thing? Will she be scared for the rest of her life? Was I being too harsh? Should her father & I start sleeping with one eye open!?

So! Yesterday. I’m driving her to school and she says to me, “you know my friends told me that I should ask you if there was something that I could do that would make you change your mind about letting me go to the dance…” Me: blah, blah, blah, more useless lecturing that she’s totally not listening to. As she’s getting out of the car she asks me again, “so what’s your answer?” Me: oh, sweetie, I haven’t changed my mind. And then, after school, there’s yet another attempt but this time it includes a request from her Drama teacher to participate in the Haunted House that’s panned for the school dance. “But MOM she wants me to do this!” Me: well that’s unfortunate because you’re not going to the dance. You know what? You gotta give her props for trying!

 

Thanks for listening, or reading (if you must be technical),

Ciao

 

P.S. Last night she mentions to me that her girlfriend is also not going to the dance due to a punishment so MAYBE they could have a sleepover! Bwahahahahaa. Um, no. I’m certain this isn’t over yet. Two more days till the dance. Here’s to hoping I survive.

Wherein I whine about time going by quickly and my kids getting older but what else is new?

Life moves pretty fast. But I’m sure that isn’t news to any of you. We are coming to the end of another school year. 6 days and counting down. And while I am really happy about it on the one hand (not having to get the gremlins to school so damn early in the morning, homework, projects, so on and so forth), on the other hand it means that I’ll have a 6th grader and 1st grader! Aaaaaaaah! Where has the time gone?? I can’t believe my kids are so old. Ha. Yeah, I know that means that I’m old, too. Deh.

I’m not looking forward to homework assignments, which ~I’m sure~ will be harder and therefore more time consuming for Honey bunny. This, of course, equals me spending more time helping her. And Pumpkin will be in school full day! Yay! No more running back & forth to pick up two children at two completely different times.

I feel like there is a point when things will slow down. At least I hope it will. If we can just make it through the next week, then things should be less busy. *crosses fingers* We’ve got some fabulous trips planned for the summer. Trips that I’ve been anticipating for awhile now. I’ll have to remember to try extraspecially (yes, I did just mash-up those words) not to rush through the vacays. Or life, in general. Remember to slooooooooww down and enjoy the time. Stop to smell the roses. As ‘they’ say. Whoever ‘they’ are.

 

Thanks for listening (or reading, if you must be technical),

Ciao

Posted via email from Mother Musing

Growing up fast

I feel as if I am constantly trying to slow down my Honey bunny. What do I mean? She’s growing up, getting bigger, becoming a young lady, and I’m doing just about everything in my power to make sure she doesn’t grow up too fast.

Is it wrong of me? Maybe. Do I think it’s the wrong way to handle it? Well, obviously no. But this is not to say that I’m not still helping her become an independent person, the thing is I really don’t want her to rush into her teenage years before she is actually a teenager. Make sense?

Like getting a cell phone and texting apps and email accounts and so on.

There is plenty of time yet for those things. But of course, she wants them all & she wants them all NOW. And she isn’t afraid to whine, beg, ask, whine, beg, and ask again. Even though we’ve told her 5,000 times that she isn’t getting a cell phone or email until point X in time.

I know there are parents who let their children have cell phones in the 5th grade (or earlier & that is their right) but for me (and our situation) I don’t feel it’s necessary for a 10 yr old to have a cell phone or email or texting abilities.

I guess I don’t want her to miss out on being a kid. Like not having to worry about things that are still way over her head. I suppose I’m trying to protect her for a bit longer before I become known only as the annoying, interfering parent. Or wait? Maybe I’m already known as that….

Thanks for listening (or reading, if you must be technical),

Ciao

Posted via email from Mother Musing

Siblings

What is it about some kids that makes it nearly impossible for them to get along with their brothers or sisters?
What is it inside that sparks the jealousy and desire to steal parental attention?
And why does it happen even when the parents try to provide equal attention to both children?
What is inside one child to needle, tease, and irritate the other? No matter how many F-ing times you tell me to stop it.
How many more times am I gonna have to say, “for the love of Pete would you leave your sister alone!” or “you two need to get along!”
Sometimes separation works (and at times is absolutely necessary for the survival of the children) but honestly that doesn’t teach them how to work stuff out.
In the real world we have to deal with all different personalities. There isn’t always the chance to just walk away from a person that is up in yer grill. You have to stay to figure it out. Well, what an excellent time to learn how to do that.
The problem for me is how frequently the arguing & fighting is occurring. It has my nerves frazzled beyond belief.
You know what, I don’t remember fighting with my sister as much as these two do.
There are times, rare, rare times when they get along, talk nicely to each other, and help each other. It is like heaven come down to earth. You think I’m exaggerating? For me it feels like heaven.
Thanks for listening (or reading, if you must be technical),
Ciao

Posted via email from Mother Musing

Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream, or at least less arguing at bedtime

Bedtime is such a pleasant time in our household. Bwhahahahahaha. No, not really. It is, and I’m sure this comes as no surprise to you, a challenge. As it probably is in your household as well. I’m guessing. But I suppose I could be wrong. Maybe it’s a breeze for you. If it is, then DON’T tell me. I wanna keep believing that I’m not alone in this nightmare.

Anywhoo, with two gremlins at two diverse age groups with two different bedtimes, it is quite a bit of work. But perhaps I’m making this harder on myself than necessary. Let me explain… right now I begin getting Pumpkin ready for bed at roughly 6:30pm. This includes bath, getting pjs on, teeth brushing, reading a couple books, back rubbing for a minute or so, hugs or three, kisses, more hugs, and more kisses, a cup of water, a trip to the bathroom. More water. Now take all that and times it by two because at approx 7:45pm I’m doing this same thing all over again for Honey bunny. Only with fewer books (since she can read on her own) and less help with the putting on of pjs and teeth brushing because really she’s nine. She’s been doing this for awhile.

If I just put them to bed at the same time it probably wouldn’t be as bad. Or I could be totally deluding myself.

Honey bunny would whine & moan & stomp & whine (yes, I wrote that again intentionally), oh and let us not forget the backtalking! and attitude! about going to bed so early if I switched her bedtime to match that of Pumpkin’s. On the other hand, if I allow Pumpkin to stay up until Honey bunny’s bedtime, then I’ll end up having to deal with an extra extra grumpy little gremlin come morning.

As it is right now Pumpkin ends up staying awake until after 8pm because of all the activity that is still taking place throughout the house. She’s in and out of her bed nearly a half dozen times before she finally settles down to sleep. RIDICULOUSNESS! And there is only so many times I can say, “Pumpkin, get back in bed!”

I don’t know what to do. I feel like I’m being manipulated by my 4 year old. Actually, I’ll say it, I am being manipulated by my 4 year old. Sheesh. But what the hell am I supposed to do – tie her to the bed? I’m kidding. I have only thought about doing that a couple 1,000 times, I wouldn’t really, actually, *in fact* tie her to the bed. Do you think that would work? Still kidding. Heh.

What to do… what to do. I’m too tired to keep fighting this battle. I want to go get some sleep at some point before midnight! And I want to do it without arguing, fighting, crying, and whining & that’s all on my part.

Thanks for listening (or reading, if you must be technical),
Ciao

Random Tandem

randomtuesday

I don’t know what the hell the title means, either. I just felt like rhyming I guess. Because tandem by definition means: one following or behind the other and that doesn’t have anything to do with this post. So moving on now…

My “baby” turned 4 yrs old yesterday and I was all set to write a post about it but this is as far as I got:

I’ve been thinking about my little Pumpkin turning 4 years old today. It amazes me that so many years are gone, *snap* just like that. My once tiny little jaundice Pumpkin ~hence the nickname~ is now a petite little girl. With a very big attitude. How big? Hmmmm, lets just say as big as the Montana sky. Yeah it’s that big.

I’m getting pathetically nostalgic these days and this post will be no exception. It literally seems like yesterday that she was born. THANK GOD that isn’t the case but it really feels like so little time has passed although obviously much time has gone by. We were living in a different house at the time. And really so much was different. I had a 5 year old who was half way through Kindergarten, two dogs always under foot, a MUCH smaller house payment, and a lovely swimming pool.

I couldn’t get any further than that. Probably cause I got way off base & couldn’t figure a way back to my topic what with all the work I had to do, prepping items for the CPA, taking Honey bunny to karate, life, so on and so forth.

Speaking of the CPA, I got the last of our tax papers sent out to him today. *huge sigh* Now I just get to deal with the 50,000 questions that will be thrown at me. Oh, btw, we’ve already filed an extension for the business taxes & no doubt one will be filed for our personal stuff when April 15th rolls around and this shit is no where near done. Watch, now that I’ve said that, this will be the one year they finish by the deadline. Bwhahahahahahahaha. But in all fairness I did wait until March 24th to mail the info to them. So really it’s all my fault.

Only 38 pages left in this month’s book club book and if you missed last week’s RTT then here is the link to that post where I mention the book with helpful link to amazon for product description (and I think I need to talk with someone about gettin’ some $$$ for all the linking I do to them). I have really enjoyed this book & CAN’T wait to discuss it with the ladies.

It’s my turn to pick for next month’s book club choice & I’ve picked The Enchantress of Florence by Salman Rushdie.

It’s 10:03pm right now and I think I’m going to wrap this RTT up so that I can get to sleep at a moderately decent hour. Must get up in the AM and exercise, damn it. I’m already thinking about hitting the snooze button.

Thanks for listening (or reading, if you must be technical),

Ciao


So busy I do not know whether I am coming or going

6a00d8345157d269e200e54f406e6b8833-640wiYeah, hi! So I don’t know about you but I’ve been so swamped that I seriously don’t know which way is up. It seems like every single blessed day is jam packed with so much activity. And the last couple weeks were the worse, worst, worstest? Between getting ready to go to Las Vegas, coming back & getting ready for Thanksgiving, cooking all day on Thanksgiving, cleaning up all the shite from Thanksgiving, pulling out all the Christmas decorations, organizing & setting up all the Christmas trees, lights, and decorations, then cleaning all the misc mess from that.  On top of dealing with the gremlins and regular ‘ol household chores, bills, and random stuff. My head hasn’t stopped spinning yet.

It’s a miracle I can even put these sentences together. And work is insane right now. I can’t figure out how I seem to have gotten so behind on stuff.

Every time I begin to think about the list of To Do items I still haven’t written down (let alone started doing) I feel a panic attack coming on. Christmas cards for friends, family, customers… Aaahhhhhhhhk. Christmas shopping for gifts for family & friends… Eeeehhhhhhk. Year end tax papers… Ooohhhhhhhk.  HALP!

stress-picture-stress-relief-kit

Oh, did I mention that I have to take the gremlins Christmas photo so that I can include it with the Christmas cards? No? What about the fact that Pumpkin hacked off two sections of hair right at her bangs? Did I tell you that part? No? Well yeah, she did that last Monday. At least I think I can strategically brush her hair so that it won’t “appear” to be HACKED off in two places. I don’t know why I’m surprised by her doing this. I shouldn’t be. Honey bunny did the same thing. It’s totally normal. But still RIGHT before I have to take their picture?! Could the timing be any better?

Well, anyway, thanks for listening (or reading, if you must be technical),

Ciao

P.S. I’m gonna go avoid doing all the things I know I need to be doing just to F*CK things up for later. Cause I’m a rebel like that. And procrastination is my middle name, baby.