Someone is NOT happy with me

Better late than never… I say that because her b-day was last month. Ahem. And this photo was from the week of her party. I was “helping” my Little Pumpkin get the invitations ready for her 8th birthday party. But I got a bit ahead of her. This is what I get for trying to help! Disgruntled almost 8 yr old says…

Nothing like a temper tantrum over imessage. And aren’t parents suppose to ruin everything for their kids? I’m fairly certain that is listed in my unofficial title. Mom, Ruiner of EVERYTHING! In case you were wondering, all I did was fill in the details of the party. Exactly as all the other invites were written. With the same exact pen, even. But I ruined them! Haha. So I handed out those bitches anyway or the kid wouldn’t have had any friends at her party.

Thanks for listening (or reading, if you must be technical),
Ciao

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Hair roller hell or how I almost had to cut my kid’s hair outta rollers

I know I’m not the only Mom to which this situation has happened. But it’s never happened to me before! I nearly had to cut out 10 hair rollers from my Little Pumpkin’s hair!! All because of the BLEEPITY BLEEPING BLEEP hair rollers were all tangled in her hair!! And we had FIVE minutes before she had to leave for school! And I was panicking!! And she was screaming!! And there was crying!! And OMG HELP US!! I felt horrible, absolutely terrible about the whole ordeal. Her poor little scalp. Not to mention her psyche.

Well, despite all the screaming and crying it turned out all right. I was finally able to get her hair untangled from the roller’s teeth (which were really the culprits all along) WITHOUT cutting her hair at random points. Damn, that would have been a real nightmare. Probably these rollers weren’t meant for her length of hair anyway because of the teeth. Really, the damn things were given to my gremlins to pretend play beauty salon (or whatever) and I should have just thrown them away a long time ago. Which is EXACTLY what I did as soon as the husband & Pumpkin were on their way to school.

I just have to add, I did try to warn her about these particular rollers when I was putting them in her hair. We also have the foamy, squishy kind that DON’T get tangled in hair. But NOOOOO, she wanted to have these ones put in. So, lesson learned. Hopefully. What lesson do I hope that she learned? LISTEN to your mother. What lesson did I learn? Push your argument a little stronger.  Maybe, she’ll listen. Or most likely, she’ll still want her own way. What am I gonna do? She’s got a determined personality. Much like her mother & father.

 

Thanks for listening (or reading, if you must be technical),

Ciao

Heaven help us

We're gonna have an official teenager in our midst very, very soon. GAH!! Oh, sure we've been getting the tween attitude for a while now but my Honey bunny is officially turning teen in less than 3 days. You know what scares me about this whole situation, beyond the typical teenagery stuff, she has internet access! She knows the name of my blog! At any point in time she can type in the url, be whizzed away, and read EVERY LAST THING I've written about her, her sister, myself, and at times, her father on this VERY BLOG!! Not to mention the random posts about whathaveyou, that until this point in time I've never worried about her reading.

NOW! Now, I am most assuredly freaking out. Probably there is no reason to have a conniption fit before the fact. I just tend to do that sort of thing, you understand.

But I digress, my baby is becoming a teenager. The HELL. My BABY is becoming a teenager. Hold on a sec while I process that thought… Ok, I'm back.

The two of us have been party planning for awhile now. It's a delicate balance between kids party and non-kids party. She decided to invite some boys this year. Oooooohh! I know. Boys!! The husband & I are figuring that we'll be kept on our toes by this gathering since it's at our house. She wondered out-loud to me, what if there's an awkward moment or we don't know what to say. So we've been detailing what to do for the whole time to try to minimize any weirdness. I hope for her sake that this party is fun for her & her friends.

I'm so proud of her and all she's accomplished in her life to-date. I'm sure I'll be even more proud of her in the years to come. Probably we won't always get along in these up-coming years but it'll no doubt be interesting!

Happy 13th birthday to my Honey bunny!!

Thanks for listening (or reading, if you must be technical),

Ciao

 

And the winner is….

ME! I win! I win the ‘Most Hateful Mom of the World’ award. How did I win? What did I win? How did you not know that there was even such a contest?! To start, how did I win? I won because I’m the meanest, most horrible mom. What did I win? I won a trip! A Mommy Guilt trip! Just for me. Disclaimer: Sorry this contest was not broadcast state or nationwide.

Well, let me tell you a little bit more of the story….

You see, it all started a long time ago, when my Honey bunny first started “fibbing” to me about brushing & flossing her teeth. This went on for awhile with rewards and/or punishment distributed periodically until the dentist finally had to mandate that she come to the office for check-ups & cleanings every 4 months because her teeth and gums were so badly deteriorating. I’m just gonna say, that my daily nagging was clearly not making a difference cuz she still wasn’t doing it.

Ok! Fast forward to a few days ago when I asked her if she was ready for school, including the usual, EVERY DAY things necessary to be ready for school, e.g., flossing, teeth brushing, face washing, to which she replied “Yes MOM, I’m ready”, and due to the fact that she’s perhaps been less truthful in the past, I asked again (thinking that maybe I’d give her ‘the out’ to come up & complete the tasks if she really hadn’t done them – damn am I an enabler?) but she says to me “WHY DON’T YOU BELIEVE ME?!” *read with whiny voice*

Right. Well, I decide I’d check out the situation in her bathroom sink before jumping to any conclusions. Uh oh. BONE DRY. I MEAN REALLY BONE DRY. Damn it! Now I’m gonna have to do something I really, very much do NOT want to do. What?! You’re probably screaming, what did you do?! I called her to come up to her bathroom and pointed to the Sahara desert that was her sink and asked how she could possibly have washed her face, flossed, and brushed her teeth in that sink. Her response was that it had dried. Suuuuure. At this juncture, I presented exhibit B, her little sister’s bathroom sink which was still wet from when she finished all the morning routine nearly an hour prior.

Shit slowly began to spiral outta control when I tell her that I was gonna have to do something now due to her total lie, that she brought it on herself, and that because she knows what she did was wrong, so on and so forth. I told her that she wouldn’t be able to go to the Halloween dance at school on Friday. Now comes the swirling vortex of crying, begging, pleading, bargaining, and more crying. Oh, just wait, it gets better.

15 minutes it has taken us to have this “conversation”, so now I’m not ready for work and she’s got to get to school before she’s late. I tell her to give me the permission slip & money for the dance. Commence additional wailing, pleading, bargaining (she told me I could take away her CELLPHONE, computer, and TV privileges, if I’d just let her go to the dance – heeyyy, I must have really struck a nerve with this punishment), crying, and the coup de grâce, “YOU HATE ME!!” Ahhhhh, life with an almost teenager. So much fun. Said NO ONE EVER. And now me too. I felt ill and so very sad because I wanted her to go to the dance! And have fun with her friends! But I just couldn’t let it go this time. I had to put my foot down. But damn it if I didn’t feel as horrible about the whole thing as she did. Was I doing the right thing? Will she be scared for the rest of her life? Was I being too harsh? Should her father & I start sleeping with one eye open!?

So! Yesterday. I’m driving her to school and she says to me, “you know my friends told me that I should ask you if there was something that I could do that would make you change your mind about letting me go to the dance…” Me: blah, blah, blah, more useless lecturing that she’s totally not listening to. As she’s getting out of the car she asks me again, “so what’s your answer?” Me: oh, sweetie, I haven’t changed my mind. And then, after school, there’s yet another attempt but this time it includes a request from her Drama teacher to participate in the Haunted House that’s panned for the school dance. “But MOM she wants me to do this!” Me: well that’s unfortunate because you’re not going to the dance. You know what? You gotta give her props for trying!

 

Thanks for listening, or reading (if you must be technical),

Ciao

 

P.S. Last night she mentions to me that her girlfriend is also not going to the dance due to a punishment so MAYBE they could have a sleepover! Bwahahahahaa. Um, no. I’m certain this isn’t over yet. Two more days till the dance. Here’s to hoping I survive.

Married with children

I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again, I don’t want to rush or wish these years away. However, there is a part of me that can’t wait till my gremlins are grown up and away at college. Why? Because being married and being married with children is NOT the same thing.

I’m sure you know what I’m talking about.

Your relationship with your spouse is majorly affected by children. Right? Would you agree with me on this? Well, if you don’t, then you’re an idiot.

How I interacted with my husband while it was just the two of us is COMPLETELY different than how I interact with him now that we have two daughters. And I know the same is true for him.

All of my childhood, all of his childhood, our experiences with our parents, our experiences with friends, all the cumulative experiences we had growing up play a part in who we are now and how we parent or how we believe we should parent our kids. No duh. But the major problem with this is that we don’t always agree on how we should teach, discipline, reward, punish, and love the children.

Here is the crux of the situation. Not agreeing with each other creates a perfect environment for fighting. Especially when you have two STRONG willed personalities. Personalities that believe they’re always right.

Oh, we got along splendidly when it was just the two of us. When it became the three and then the four of us it wasn’t always so smooth.

I’m not saying it’s bad. Not by ANY stretch. Our life together and our marriage has become stronger than ever before. Deeper, more meaningful. Having children has created challenges, though, unlike anything we EVER thought possible. (Or maybe it was only me dreaming of a perfect life with perfectly behaved children.)

This is why I’m saying I wish the kids were grown up. Because it was sooooooooooo much easier without them! Although I would never trade it. Now that I know what it is like to have the children, I would not ever choose to give them up. They are far, far too precious to me. They have taught me so much. I always use to believe that the kids don’t teach the parents anything. I couldn’t have been MORE wrong. The learning process is so much harder than anything I’ve ever had to learn before. And it very much does happen. The depth of soul searching & questioning is rivaled only by that of being confronted with the death of a parent or someone else as important. At least as far as I’m concerned.

But my gremlins have been great play partners as well! How else would I have a perfect excuse to watch cartoons, learn about Pokemon, and see Justin Beiber movies?!

There are times, many times, when I can’t wait to get to the point when my husband & I can be the two of us again without constant interruptions and disputes.

But! This means wishing my children’s youth away & wishing my own “youth” away as well. And missing out on all these experiences that truly make up a full life. Frankly, I don’t want to be that much closer to death. I’ve still got too much livin’ to do.

Thanks for listening (or reading, if you must be technical),

Ciao

Posted via email from Mother Musing

Siblings

What is it about some kids that makes it nearly impossible for them to get along with their brothers or sisters?
What is it inside that sparks the jealousy and desire to steal parental attention?
And why does it happen even when the parents try to provide equal attention to both children?
What is inside one child to needle, tease, and irritate the other? No matter how many F-ing times you tell me to stop it.
How many more times am I gonna have to say, “for the love of Pete would you leave your sister alone!” or “you two need to get along!”
Sometimes separation works (and at times is absolutely necessary for the survival of the children) but honestly that doesn’t teach them how to work stuff out.
In the real world we have to deal with all different personalities. There isn’t always the chance to just walk away from a person that is up in yer grill. You have to stay to figure it out. Well, what an excellent time to learn how to do that.
The problem for me is how frequently the arguing & fighting is occurring. It has my nerves frazzled beyond belief.
You know what, I don’t remember fighting with my sister as much as these two do.
There are times, rare, rare times when they get along, talk nicely to each other, and help each other. It is like heaven come down to earth. You think I’m exaggerating? For me it feels like heaven.
Thanks for listening (or reading, if you must be technical),
Ciao

Posted via email from Mother Musing

Reduce, Reuse, Recycle or more like reuse, recycle and reuse again

The title of this post might lead you to believe that I’m gonna discuss how to be good to planet Earth. But you’d be WRONG! I don’t really care about the planet. I kid, I kid. I care a little. Ok, so really this is an idea that I picked up from Enna’s blog and specifically her post “Pork from a year ago”. It got me thinking that I should reminisce about the past some more and maybe share with you good folks a few of my posts from the past. Sort of like ghosts from the past. But less ghostly. It only took me months to complete. Heh.

Now, are you starting to get the tie-in with my title? You all have brains, I’m sure I don’t need to explain it anymore. Reading through these old post also reminds me that there once was a time when I actually wrote posts with a central topic, a beginning, a middle, and an end. Oh well. Life is busier now. And I don’t have as much time to focus on my writing.

I’ll start this out with a post from my other blog that I seem to have forgotten existed until a nice person commented on this post about growing up. The scary thing is it was from nearly 3 freakin’ years ago. Holy mother of —. THREE years. And the angst that I was feeling then has multiplied by infinity. You can do the math.

This post is one in which I frustrate my daughter. Mwahahahahaha. I’m so glad I get to torture her every now and again.

Still haven’t figured out how to keep everyone from yelling at each other.

How about this… mommy has a tantrum the likes of which no one has ever seen before. I still haven’t gotten my time out.

Bedtime = funtime or not really. Although I must say, it is getting a smidge easier since Pumpkin is getting older.

In which I have to have the talk with Honey bunny.

I need a wife to do my laundry cause I really don’t like to do laundry. But then who in their right mind likes to do laundry?

Thanks for listening (or reading, if you must be technical),
Ciao