Vomit post now with extra helpings of vomit

WARNING: If you have a weak stomach or prefer not to read about vomit, then don’t read this post. If, on the other hand you are a Mom and deal with this all the time & you’re not a man that will gag at the first sign of anything remotely gross, then please continue reading the remainder of this post.

I got the call on Friday just about 12 noon. The dreaded phone call from the preschool. Your child has puked and you better come pick her/him up right away. GREAT! Immediately I’m thinking, ‘fabulous. guess I won’t be getting any work done today’. I know! I’m a terrible mom. But I have a Sh*tload of work to do and the year is almost over!! Anyway, so off I went to get her & take her home. When I got to the school the teachers were all excited to tell me how the whole puking thing went down, and I wasn’t opposed to hearing the story. Here’s the dets: all the kids had just sat at the little picnic style tables they eat at during nice weather, inc. Pumpkin, she took out her sandwich, took one bite, turned her head away from the table, and then puked on the ground. She’s so thoughtful!! But apparently she got some on her sleeve and immediately demanded to be changed (who wouldn’t?!).

We skeedaddled on outta there to go straight home. We change our clothes again, I made some chicken noodle soup with saltines (every mother’s cure for any problem), we settled on the couch to watch a smidge of t.v., and for some real rest. TWO HOURS LATER, she had still not fallen asleep. Was in fact, ready to go. ‘Come on mommy, lets play this game’ Well I’d had about enough of that so I told her, you’d better settle down on this couch NOW or I’m putting you in your room to take a nap (see how I put my foot down – I’m a disciplinarian). We, and when I say that – I really mean she, decided to pick a movie to watch from her bedroom. I didn’t give two straws which movie or from what room just as long as she lay down!

It was during the trip down the hallway to her bedroom that she puked again. Happily! She told me it was coming so we made it to the toilet on time!

Well now I’m starting to get worried. It’s Friday if she’s getting really sick, then we won’t be able to see the doctor until Monday, maybe I should take her in just to be safe. The gremlin’s pediatrician’s office is quite close to our house & they had an appt available in 45 mins. I get some truly essential things done (twitter & blog reading) then got ready to go. I walked out to the living room to find her passed out on the couch. OF COURSE!! Just when we needed to leave.

OK, this is starting to drag on, so I’ll give it to you quick like. Nothing was wrong, no temp, nada. $35 paid to doctor for 5 minutes of time. We went to my folks for dinner that night – long story and I won’t bore you with that one now – she never ate dinner, fell asleep on their couch, and slept until we left at 10:00pm. She woke up at 1:50am puking down the hallway to her bathroom. Poor thing, at least she tried to make it to the toilet. Got her all cleaned up. I realized I should have put a bucket of sorts next to her bed for just this type of emergency – DUH – so I did & good thing too because at some point between 2:00am & 5:30am she vomited into the bucket.

NOW, we’re on Saturday. No puking all day! Hurrah! Must have been a 24hr bug. It’s gone now, excellent. We like to delude ourselves.

So we go to the husband’s parent’s house for dinner. Again, she doesn’t eat anything, was really tired, and fell asleep on the car ride home. The husband & I stayed up watching Madtv which means that I don’t fall asleep until after midnight. At 2:45am I heard Pumpkin say (and I hear this because we still have the baby monitor in her room), ‘mommy I throwed up in my bed’. I hauled ass into her room to find a huge pile of puke on her bed. FANTASTIC! I get her out of the bed whereby she commences vomiting into the bucket.

At this point I’m trying to decide which catastrophe to fix first. Clean her up? Clean the bucket? Change the sheets? Wash the puke out of the sheets? Get her some water? I’m exhausted but know that I have to get this crap done so she can go back to sleep. One item after the other got completed until I could finally return to bed. But my word, cleaning a bucket of vomit is disgusting. Washing bedsheets in the sink to remove chunks before putting them into the machine is disgusting.

And here we are now at 9:46pm. We’ve gone the whole day without puking. I just hope it’s all gone. I just want my little Pumpkin to feel better! And yeah, being the terrible mommy that I am, I just want to get a decent night’s sleep.

Thanks for listening (or reading, if you must be technical),


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